I finished the first five days of the shred consecutively, even though I got my period on the second day which made things a little less pleasant. I took yesterday off because I work a double every Saturday, so I really had no time to shred. I was planning on continuing today, but I really think I need to give my body an extra day because my job KICKED MY ASS yesterday. It was Northampton Pride Day and so we were SLAMMED. I worked the longest shift I have ever worked in my life (11 hours) without a break, and made more money than I have ever made in one day. It was really intense and a workout in itself. My legs and arms are still killing me, and I barely had time to eat, so I think I deserve another day to recover. The end.
Here I go again.
The semester is over (minus one exam tomorrow) and I have decided to focus my summer on health and wellness of the physical and spiritual kind. I’ve written a little about going vegetarian and trying to transition to veganism, and that is essentially what I want to try and do this summer. Although I’m not sure that I will ever become a full on vegan, I do want to omit animal products from anything I cook and eat at home, and reserve those things for eating out and special occasions with friends. I also want to get into a good workout routine and tone back up, as I’ve lost any and all progress that I made in the fall during this past semester. I’m starting with Jillian Micheal’s Thirty Day Shred because I have done it before and loved it, and got good results. After that I’m probably going to do Ripped in Thirty, and then maybe I’ll advance to something different. I will also be hiking, biking, and carrying 30 pound trays up and down stairs 30+ hours a week all summer, so if I don’t look my best by the end of the summer, I’ll be baffled as shit. Anyway, I really just want to feel good and learn more about nutrition and cooking plant-based meals, but looking good and working hard make me feel good, so yeah. I don’t really have a ton to say, so I’m not sure that I’ll post everyday, but hopefully a lot, as I want to share my adventures, because if I can pull this off and really accomplish something, then anyone can!
I worked out on Saturday, but kind of half-assed it and quit in the middle. Sometimes it literally feels like I have an angel on one shoulder and a devil on the other - one pushing me to workout and go through with my plan, to work hard and it will pay off, and the other just telling me to throw in the towel, give up, just hang out and don’t worry about working out. Sometimes the devil gets the best of me, but not usually.
I’m not ready to post my after pictures yet. For one, I haven’t actually completed Thirty full days of working out and I want to at least get ten full days in of level three. Also, I’ve really stopped dieting almost all together lately. Mostly because we haven’t had a ton of food, and my roommate is always willing to spend money on taking me out to eat, and how can I refuse a delicious meal with my best friend? I guess I should learn. Anyway. gonna start focusing more on my eating this month. My work here is never done!
I skipped Thursday and worked out on Friday. The month is just about over, and although I know I’m stronger I don’t think I look any different at all. If that is the case it can only be my fault because my diet kind of went out the window at some point this month and I know that all the fast food and sweets I ate didn’t help me melt any of that belly fat I want to get rid of. SO next month my goal is to focus more on what I eat and also keep working out. I’m probably going to do another challenge too!
It’s getting kind of monotonous writing the same thing every day, but I did start level three. I did it Monday and Tuesday night and got my ass kicked, but loved every second of it. I skipped Wednesday, keeping me on this two days on, one day off pattern I’ve been on, which isn’t so bad I suppose, although I really shouldn’t have skipped ANY days, but I do the best I can. I went to the Big E on Wednesday and made a conscious decision to eat an enormous amount of greasy fried food. I actually didn’t stuff myself, but I’m sure there were still a days worth of calories in all the sweet, disgusting goodness that I did consume. I don’t know why I give myself these “passes” to eat so poorly all the time. I’m tackling my diet next, but I have no idea how I’ll manage to fit it in my schedule. Planning meals, cooking, shopping - it’s all so time consuming and I’ve already been on the verge of tears a few times over the past couple of weeks because of how overwhelming my schedule is, and the hugeness of my goals. However, I keep persevering and surprising myself at every turn. I guess I should give myself a little more credit.
Anyway, I just got home from my three and a half hour American Lit class and I just want to stop using my brain for a little while.
I completed my last day of level two on Saturday morning. I really only did it seven times over the course of twelve days, but I decided to move on. There were a lot of moves I didn’t like in that workout and I ended up half-assing it because of that. Kyle, Chris, and I all had the day off on Saturday and planned to celebrate Autumn. What we had in mind I’m not really sure but it ended up just being a day of eating a lot of really sugary apple and pumpkin flavored things.
I’m glad I felt like crap the next morning, as a reminder of how much of an effect what I put in my body has on how I feel. When I binge or make bad food choices I feel heavy, bloated, lethargic - just gross. I much prefer eating food I can feel good about, and that makes me feel good. Anyway, I didn’t workout on Sunday for one reason or another, but I ate a lot better!
I worked out and I ate pretty good (stayed under my calorie limit but didn’t make all the healthiest choices), and I feel great! Even after taking a few days off I can still see results after my workout today. Real abs may not be too far off in my future if I keep it up!
So yesterday I did not work out because I was just feeling so awful after running around non-stop for several days and getting hurt. Like I said, I’m a complete baby when it comes to pain and getting sick. BUT, my body was seriously begging for some physical activity. Although I haven’t been doing that well lately I haven’t skipped more than two days in a row until yesterday, and my body could tell the difference. I just really wanted to work out! I did some leg lifts and oblique twists and really just craved getting my heart rate up. Is that weird? Whatever, I guess I must just be getting used to these changes!
I’ve kind of lost track of what day I’m actually on now, but I’m just going to keep going and switch to level three after I have a few more consecutive days of this one. I’m ready to start really dedicating myself to this again. I’ve had a few weeks to get adjusted to being busy and back in school, and it’s time to just do it. I owe this to myself.
I have no excuse for not working out on Tuesday besides that I was really busy (which doesn’t really cut it), but I do have a pretty good reason for not working out yesterday. I sustained a minor injury when I was leaving for work yesterday morning by slamming my left hand in our apartment door and now I have a throbbing, black middle fingernail. I know, I know, it’s not a huge deal, but I’m terrible at dealing with pain and the added pressure of lifting the weights really wasn’t bearable on my hand last night. At least I tried to see if I could make it through it. Luckily I already had a doctors appointment scheduled for tomorrow morning, and since my finger is still swollen and has it’s own heartbeat I’m going to see if she’ll drain it out to relieve the pressure. Apparently they heat up a needle and burn a hole through the nail to let all the blood out. Sounds pretty awful, but I can’t believe how much pain one little fingernail is causing me right now. I can’t even write! Ugh.
Anyway, I’ve really fallen out of my workout routine lately, usually doing two days in a row, then skipping one or two days, and repeating that pattern. I’m disappointed in myself, but still trying to to get discouraged to the point that I just give up. I think what I’m going to do is continue level 2 until the end of the month and then move on to level 3, and make it an absolute priority not to skip any more days. I won’t be completing the challenge that I originally joined but I will still be completing the shred and doing something good for myself. It isn’t about anyone or anything but me, and I need to remember that. So maybe everyone will stop reading this because its beginning to look like I’m a pathetic failure, but that’s not the point. I want to get in shape, and I want to see results, and I want to have discipline and self-control and feel good about myself. It doesn’t matter it it takes 30 days, or 40 days, or 60 days, as long as I don’t give up.
Let me just run you through my past two days real quick. Sunday morning I worked out before I did anything else. I have much better luck when I work out before I get my day started, and it’ a great way to actually get me off the couch before Kathy Lee & Hoda because I immediately want to shower after. Anyway, I did homework for most of the afternoon Sunday and then picked Jordan up for work at 4:30. I got home a little before midnight. Monday morning I woke up at 7:30 (late!) and worked at LGA until 3:30. I had no time to eat breakfast or pack a lunch, but luckily my sweetheart boyfriend brought me a pb&j, craisins, and a big water bottle. As soon as I got home from work Kyle and I had to go get a truck at his stepdad’s and then to my grandparents to pick up a couch they were giving us. Everything in Western Mass is stupid far apart so we didn’t get home from doing all of this until 6:30-7:00ish, at which point I was famished and made us all spaghetti and meat sauce for dinner and read the first 16 chapters of “The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn”. At about 9PM I got a random burst of energy and that little motivating voice in my head decided to make a reappearance and wouldn’t let me quit, so I did my workout before watching a new episode of Weeds. Got about six hours of sleep Monday night and got to my 9:30 class on time Tuesday morning. When my school day was done at 4:30 I was greeted by a parking ticket because I parked on the curb after circling the parking lot several times and finally giving up when I decided getting to class on time was more important. Shortly after I got home my mom, stepdad, and brother came over for a visit because they were in town for a funeral. They stayed until about 6:15 when Chris and I had to leave to meet up with our drummer and check out a practice space for the band. Got home from there a little after 7:00, made a pb&j and did some homework until Wes arrived. Wes, my keyboard teacher showed up around 8:45 and left only a few minutes before I started writing this post. So, I apologize for the lack of updates over the past few days. Needless to say I haven’t really stopped, but at least I made time for what’s really important. :-)
I worked out on Friday and skipped Saturday. Trying to get my motivation back after it slowly declined over the past week is proving difficult. With school back in full swing my schedule doesn’t always allow for me to get my workout done early in the morning, and as the day goes on my mind gets filled with more and more things, and not thoughts of working out. I know that this is no excuse, I know I can do it if I really want to. But I try to justify skipping my workout or eating something unhealthy by telling myself, “Oh, I don’t have to workout, I look fine, I should enjoy this ice cream cone, I deserve it”. That’s not the point though, I have something to prove to myself and it’s bigger than a six pack. It’s about self-control, perseverance, determination, and willpower. It’s about seeing that hard work really does pay off, and proving to myself that I’m still the girl I used to be, the one who could “move mountains if she wanted to”.
On the bright side, did I mention that I can now do real push ups for the first time in my life? Imagine what else I could do if I stick to it!
(But hey, tomorrow is the halfway mark, which means I still have time to kick some serious ass before it’s over.)
If I fall, I get back up. There is no quitting.
Welp, level two of the 30DS had me feeling like I was literally going to die. No joke. I’ve been doing it at night as opposed to in the morning, which may or may not have something to do with how much harder it feels than the first level. Unfortunately thats been the only time I have with school, work, keyboard, and all other responsibilities, but at least I’m squeezing it in somewhere! Even when I try to limit myself to a few goals and focuses I still feel completely overwhelmed. Ugh. Anyway, I’m happy being busy. I wouldn’t want it any other way.
So I completed the first two days of level two, and skipped yesterday. I’m not beating myself up over it though, because I’m still doing so much better than I ever have in the past, and my body needs time to rest as well, right? It was a conscious decision too, not a lack of willpower or control. I just decided not to workout, and that’s just going to be okay. As long as I get back on the horse today, of course. :-)
AND, my calorie intake and food choices were much better over the past few days, so I can feel good about that. I only had one breadstick at work yesterday, and on the days I didn’t have work I cooked and ate totally clean (with the exception of an ice cream or frozen yogurt to treat myself at the end of the night.)
I think I’ve really started to notice results. My arms have changed the most, and honestly I don’t even know if I like it. I feel like I have man arms, but I guess thats just in contrast to my usually scranny physique. I hope my body is really changing though, because I’m afraid I just think it is because I feel like it should be and I feel better about myself. I’ve decided not to take any in-between progress pictures though, because I want to see a serious contrast when I take my after pictures at the end of the month!